Finding Your Identity

By Louis Kim

Every student has heard the sayings “Just be yourself,” and “Everyone is special in their own way.” From speeches to simple advice, everyone has heard some form of the above one way or another. However, as easy as it sounds, the solution to finding one’s own identity isn’t a simple motivational speech or a quick change in mindset. Giving this advice is simple, but turning those words into actions is what makes this a difficult task. Everyone should know what they want and who they are as people, especially as time goes on, and they learn more and more about themselves. Unfortunately as a student, the goal doesn’t become finding out about one’s self but rather fitting in with everybody else.

The pressure of trying to fit into a group is sometimes blamed on having bad friends or people who look down on you and make someone feel the need to change from who they really are. Some people have tried to fit in and become someone in the crowd so much that they can no longer find the difference between themselves and who they pretend to be. However, these cases do not apply to everyone, as usually when a student tries to fit in with others it is caused by their own worries and insecurities that they feel about themselves. From common things such as looks, clothes, personality, and skill, we always seem to find a way to find any imperfections about ourselves that we desperately want to change and grow our insecurities from that, causing us to fall into the spiral of self-hate. Thankfully, those flaws we see are what makes us who we are as people. As corny and cliche as it sounds, it is true that everyone is different in their own way with their own flaws and strengths. 

At the same time, this doesn’t mean we can’t and shouldn’t join groups or have friends. Everyone needs a good friend in their life and those friends are usually what bring out the true version of ourselves. By surrounding ourselves with people we start to learn what we like or dislike and we grow more of an idea of what our identities are. Friends are a blessing in disguise. Whether we lose them or gain them. It’s ok to feel insecure about one’s flaws as no human being is perfect, but one shouldn’t hate themselves for who they are. Finding one’s identity can seem easy at times, but we all change and grow making it difficult for someone to find who they truly are. 

In the end, one should just be comfortable with who they are and shouldn’t be scared of fitting in with society. Try making friends, try new things, go into clubs! Finding our identities doesn’t mean making ourselves into entirely new people, but revealing the true ones that lie just beneath the surface, waiting to come out. There will always be times where we can feel criticized for who we are, but use those critiques to learn and grow. With so much more ahead for people in life, it's natural to change, but what matters most is just being ourselves and to find our own individualities.